“KRYPTONITE” for Men of God

When God created woman for man in the Garden of Eden she was everything man (Adam) needed or would ever want in a companion. Some of the language may be a little explicit in this chapter but it is very much biblical and needed for saints to read and understand. Many Christian thinkers and theologians have debated as to why the serpent (Satan) tempted the woman and not the man. The reason is VERY simple! A man's greatest temptation IS a woman.

A woman was made specifically and carefully, by the Lord God almighty! Man was alone and needed a companion, or as the scripture states “ A Helpmete”. In the Hebrew the word helpmete is EZER! Every time you see the word EZER in scripture it means HELP, for example the name EBEN-EZER means “The Lord is my HELP”. The woman is to be a man’s HELP! A man is not complete without a woman. This is why men that lose wives to death OR divorce USUALLY remarry. This is also why men have a capacity to be able to also love more than one woman. In many cultures it is acceptable for a men to have more than one wife. (I am not condoning this just pointing out a fact)

When the devil tempted eve he appealed to her intellect and emotions, men on the other hand are not that complex when it comes to what will get his attention. Men are visual creatures that sexually get aroused by what they see. This is why men don’t need a lot of stimuli to get sexually aroused. Candles and soft music make women happy, but a man can have sex anywhere and anytime as long as the women in question is sexually appealing in some way. The truth of the matter is the woman doesn’t have to be very beautiful. Women have an appeal to men that goes beyond beauty. The fact that she is a woman is often enough. God made women look very different for a reason, to appeal to men. A woman’s breast are large and soft, her legs are softer than a man’s are, her eyes are usually prettier and brighter, her voice softer, even her feet are pretty (some women) and her hair longer. The big DIFFERENCE is the clincher! A woman has a vagina!

This body part is what separates her from a man. Remember the woman is delicate and beautiful, even her vagina resembles a flower. Women have soft lips! I remember the first girl I ever kissed on the lips! I could not sleep that night! All I could remember was how soft her lips were. Now I need to stop because I am not trying to get YOU aroused, but I am trying to make a point! The reason Satan went after the woman was he knew that the man would give in to the woman. Satan always perverts God’s gifts. Women were created to help men have dominion in the earth. (Read Proverbs 31)

Pr 31:11 Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value. NIV
When a man has a woman in his life that loves God and loves him he has a great treasure. In the reverse if Satan manipulates a woman in anyway the man is in trouble. I was a Correction Officer and I met a preacher in jail that had fell in love with a woman that had a drug problem. He tried to rehabilitate her but in stead she caused him to fall back into his previous lifestyle which was filled with drug usage and bondage. How could such a thing happen? Well before I give you my thoughts just think about David.

David loved God probably more than any human that ever lived did, and he fell prey to sexual temptation. We often try and pick apart the scenario that led up to the fall of David. Yes there were many factors. 1. David should have been on the battlefield. 2. David was away from the Ark of the Covenant, which was the very presence of God. 3. David was alone, a lack of accountability since the priest and the prophets were also on the field of battle. 4. The reason we all overlook and we don’t want to deal with…BATHSHEBA WAS BEAUTIFUL! I am sure David had seen other women that looked beautiful, but the devil made sure that David would see one that would cause his libido to go into overload. All men have specifics when it comes to a woman. Some men like skinny women, some men like athletic women and some men (ahem) like voluptuous women. The devil knows your fleshly desires because the weapons of HIS warfare all deal with our FLESH (I Cor. 10:13). If you like a thick, light-skinned girl, with gray eyes and pretty legs then guess what, The devil will send her your way! If dark-skinned girls with wide hips, and large breast are your thing well the devil knows that too.

When I was a teenager I had a serious crush on Chaka Khan! I spent most of my adult live looking for a woman that looked like Chaka Khan, well if the devil was going to try and tempt me to stray sending a Chaka Khan look alike (or the real thing) would be a good place to start wearing me down. Now I have been humorous and light- hearted in this chapter, but I am a deadly serious brother, I want you to know that the devil knows just what you like on the menu.

Samson is another example of how the enemy KNOWS our flesh! Samson was called of God to kill Philistines, and he was very good at it! The anointing would come upon Samson and he would kill Philistines like Orkin kills roaches! Now we know the scripture say “No weapon formed against us shall prosper…” but Satan didn’t use a weapon in the normal sense, he used a woman. In spite of Samson’s failure he yet completed the task at hand (Rom. 8:28). God is omniscient and nothing takes Him by surprise, he created Samson! Of course he knew Samson had a weakness for Philistine women, in spite of that God still stacked the cards in Samson’s favor. I know it seems like a failure to see Samson blind and chained between two pillars, but God’s plans can NEVER be overthrown by the devil! Now I am not excusing Samson’s behavior, but I am trying to make you understand something. All men have the same weakness! Our Kryptonite is a woman. Be careful men when you choose a wife! Make sure she loves God AND that she loves you! I used to tell young men, “It doesn’t matter what she looks like”, I don’t say that anymore! Physical attraction is a part of the package, especially for men! Women look at more internal issues like “Is he kind”, “Is he a good provider”, and “Is he sensitive to my needs”! Men are not that complicated, I kid you not! Men could see a woman working in McDonalds flipping burgers, if she is fine he will pursue her! Women will often forgo looks if the brother has earning potential and a good head on his shoulders.

Some of you will accuse me of stereotyping men as being somewhat simple, but when it comes to sex and women most men are. Chris Rock the comedian once said, “A man is only as faithful as his options”. That of course was meant to be funny, but there is a thread of truth to this statement. If a man avoids temptation he won’t fall! The Bible says in Proverbs, “Can a man take fire unto his bosom and NOT be burned”, I know from personal experience that this is very true! Back in 1983 I was a young Christian about to go to Korea for the second time. I had a girlfriend that attended church BUT who was not a Christian. She wanted to have sex before I left for Korea, We necked and made out but hadn’t gone all the way. I avoided this because I knew it was wrong, but my resistance was way low! I agreed to getting a hotel room the night before I had to fly off to Korea. I had around $800.00 dollars in the bank, but I had to go to an ATM to get some money. I had decided to disobey God and fornicate, (by the way she looked a lot like Chaka Khan). I went to the ATM put the card in and it malfunctioned and kept my card! This was on a Saturday night so I couldn’t physically go to the bank until MONDAY! My flight was Sunday morning! God rescued me from sin! My anger turned to shame because I was willingly going to sin against God. I cried on the airplane because I realized how close I came to falling prey to the devil.

I share this story because this woman was EXACTLY what I desired physically! She had long thick hair, brown skin, full lips, pretty eyes, high cheekbones, and she was built like a woman in a Ruben painting. Yes I am describing a woman that looks like Chaka Khan! (By the way Chaka’s real last name is Stevens too!) Do you understand me now! I really believe the enemy can “give” us the desires of our flesh. I know the Bible say’s “delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desire of your heart…” in the reverse of this scripture, if you delight yourself in the things of this world, Satan will “give” you the desire of your flesh and emotions. We often fall prey to our emotions as well as our fleshly desires. I really liked this girl, but I knew it was wrong to fornicate! The enemy knew I was attracted to her, but he attacked me in the emotional realm (soul) as well. The young lady in question came from a troubled home. I tried to “minister” to her! Singles should NEVER try and minister to members of the opposite sex at all.

Married ministers should NEVER minister to the opposite sex without your spouse being present! She begged me to spend the night with her. I gave in for two reasons: 1. Sexual attraction 2. The need to comfort her. Both reasons would have caused me to fall, but God intervened! Praise Jesus! There is no telling where my life would have turned out if I fell that night! When I got to Korea 2 days later (it’s a long flight), That was where I accepted the call to preach and also where God filled me with the Holy Ghost. Fornicating that night would have probably caused me to get off of the airplane in Seoul ready to have a one-year tour of “sexcapades”. I praise God for the Holy Spirit and the divine providence of God! I really believe God sets up spiritual roadblocks to help us live holy. We are lying If we think we live holy because of our “will” power! When we admit our flesh is weak THEN we can experience the willingness of the Spirit to help us. (Read Psalms 32, 38, and 51)

Why Sexual Sin is so devastating

3 And David sent and inquired after the woman. And one said, Is not this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite? (2 Sam.chapter 11)

David’s sin with Bathsheba lead to him also killing her husband as well. David spoke his own punishment when the prophet Nathan confronted him concerning his sin. Nathan used a story about a wealthy man that stole a poor man’s lamb, while he had many sheep of his own. David said this man should suffer fourfold. David lost 4 sons! David and Bathsheba lost their illegitimate son, Amnon raped Tamar his sister, Absolom avenged his sister by killing Amnon, and David’s general Joab for trying to overthrow his father’s throne killed Absolom. David’s eldest son Adonijah was killed by order of Solomon because he sought to overthrow the chosen king (Solomon). All of this because David couldn’t control his libido. It was no accident David was standing on a rooftop at the time Bathsheba was cleansing herself ritually. He knew who Bathsheba was. His closest advisor was her grandfather, and her husband was one of his military leaders. The seed of lust was already there; Satan just put some water on it.

32 But whoso committeth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding: he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul.
32 A wound and dishonour shall he get; and his reproach shall not be wiped away. (Prov. Chapter 6)

18 There be three things which are too wonderful for me, yea, four which I know not:
19 the way of an eagle in the air; the way of a serpent upon a rock; the way of a ship in the midst of the sea; and the way of a man with a maid.
20 such is the way of an adulterous woman; she eateth, and wipeth her mouth, and saith, I have done no wickedness.
21 For three things the earth is disquieted, and for four which it cannot bear: (Proverbs chapter 30)

Adultery is very devastating because in affects not only the individuals involved, but also the innocent children, the church family if the adulterer’s are believers. If Satan can weaken the family structure in the home, then the church is also weakened.

26 Thou hast also committed fornication with the Egyptians thy neighbors, great of flesh; and hast increased thy whoredoms, to provoke me to anger.
27 Behold, therefore I have stretched out my hand over thee, and have diminished thine ordinary food, and delivered thee unto the will of them that hate thee, the daughters of the Philistines, which are ashamed of thy lewd way.
28 Thou hast played the whore also with the Assyrians, because thou wast unsatiable; yea, thou hast played the harlot with them, and yet couldest not be satisfied.
29 Thou hast moreover multiplied thy fornication in the land of Canaan unto Chaldea; and yet thou wast not satisfied herewith. (Ezekiel chapter 16)

The children of Israel were lured away from their relationship with the Lord by sexual sin. God constantly warned Israel not to intermarry and fornicate with the heathen nations around them. Sexual intercourse unites the parties involved emotionally; this is called a SOUL TIE. This is why married couples are not truly married until they have sexual intercourse; it is the consummation of the marriage. When sex takes place between unmarried people they are still emotionally tied to one another, this is why Israel backslid and followed the god’s of other nations.

17 Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. (I Cor. Chapter 6)

Why Satan Uses Sex

6 And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.
7 And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons. (Gen. Chapter 3)

28 But I say unto you, that whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. (Matt. Chapter 5) KJV


25 Lust not after her beauty in thine heart; neither let her take thee with her eyelids.
26 for by means of a whorish woman a man is brought to a piece of bread: and the adulteress will hunt for the precious life.
27 Can a man takes fire in his bosom, and his clothes not be burned?
28 Can one go upon hot coals, and his feet not be burned? (Prov. Chapter 6) KJV

Satan uses sex for on simple reason…IT WORKS! In the beginning God created man (Adam) and declared, “It is not good for the man to be alone.” God created a woman FOR the man. Man was built to desire a woman. Satan went after Eve because he knew this fact. Eve gave Adam the fruit, why did Adam take it? Men throughout the ages have forsaken kingdoms, riches, position, and even God for the love of a woman. John the Baptist lost his head because of a promise Herod had to keep. Take a look!

6 But when Herod's birthday was kept, the daughter of Herodias danced before them, and pleased Herod.
7 whereupon he promised with an oath to give her whatsoever she would ask.
8 and she, being before instructed of her mother, said, Give me here John Baptist's head in a charger.
8 And the king was sorry: nevertheless for the oath's sake, and them, which sat with him at meat, he commanded it to be given her. (Matt. Chapter 14) KJV

Herod was so driven by lust over Herodias daughter’s seductive dance, he killed someone he actually admired and liked. Pornography is like gasoline on a fire, the human sex drive doesn’t need a lot to motivate it, pornography sends it over the edge, and this is why Satan uses it so often. Most movies today have full nudity or partial, our music is sexually suggestive, and adultery is so commonplace even our clergymen are notorious for their fallings.

Solomon was the worlds wisest man in the world, he was anointed by God to lead the mightiest kingdom on earth, yet he threw it all away because his desire for women. He had 700 wives and 300 concubines, and the scripture say he LOVED THEM ALL! Satan knows that woman was created for man. God created woman not only to be a companion, but also as a helper and advisor. Satan always perverts what God creates. Remember King Ahab? He was Israel’s most wicked king, guess were he got all of his advice? His wife Jezebel!

Abraham in a bout with unbelief decided to sleep with his handmaid, because he didn’t trust that God could allow Sarah to become pregnant. Who put the idea in his head to do such a thing? Sarah, his wife! Now before you accuse me of thinking woman are evil, there are many more examples of woman helping advance God’s program in the Bible than not. This is my point, if Satan can corrupt a woman, he in turn also corrupts a man as well (or men). Joseph was handpicked by God to save his people, Satan chose Potipher’s wife to tempt him to commit adultery, and fortunately Joseph was committed to God.



Pr 6:32 But a man who commits adultery lacks judgment;
whoever does so destroys himself. NIV

THE HISTORY OF SEXUAL SIN

22 And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brethren without.
23 And Shem and Japheth took a garment, and laid it upon both their shoulders, and went backward, and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces were backward, and they saw not their father's nakedness.
24 And Noah awoke from his wine, and knew what his younger son had done unto him.
25 And he said, Cursed be Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be unto his brethren. (Genesis chapter 9)

When Jonah discovered the power of the fruit of the vine, he also became the first victim of sexual sin. For years people have indicted Ham as a bad son because he discovered his father’s nakedness. Granted he should have used more discretion by covering his father, but it was Noah who got drunk and allowed his nakedness to be on display. The real villain never gets identified by most people…this would be Canaan! Ham was not cursed by Noah, what would make a man CURSE his grandson! It had to have been something really awful. Let’s look at some other scripture.

15 Woe unto him that giveth his neighbor drink, that puttest thy bottle to him, and makest him drunken also, that thou mayest look on their nakedness!
16 Thou art filled with shame for glory: drink thou also, and let thy foreskin be uncovered: the cup of the LORD'S right hand shall be turned unto thee, and shameful spewing shall be on thy glory. (Hab. Chapt.2)

Drunkenness often leads to sexual immorality, this is not something someone told me, and I’ve been there! A person’s inhibitions are lowered when drunk; will power goes out of the window. When I was a young unsaved airman back in the seventies, I would get so drunk I couldn’t remember what I did the night before. I believe Canaan was guilty of taking advantage of his grandfather’s drunkenness. Canaan is the father of Sodom and Gomorra. They were CANAANITES! I strongly believe Canaan was the first homosexual in the Bible.

The Canaanites were the most sexually deviant people of their time!

7 Keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, and that will by no means clear the guilty; visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children, and upon the children's children, unto the third and to the fourth generation. (Exodus chapter 34)

Sexual sin’s pass through bloodlines because the demons that influence the perpetrators, never die! These vile spirits haunt families for years. Have you ever noticed how certain sins and habits are prevalent in certain families? Watch the Jerry Springer Show or some of the other trash talk shows and you will see my point. Example - Bubba is a drunken adulterer, Bubba’s daddy is a drunken adulterer, and Bubba’s grandfather is a drunken adulterer. My point, sin travels through generations. The only cure is Jesus Christ! The Lord Jesus Christ is the curse “reverser”. The power of God stops the demonic flow through families.

When I worked as a County Corrections Officer in Burlington County, New Jersey, I would often see the devastating effects of generation curses. I processed an inmate one summer evening that molested his daughters. Within six months of his incarceration, The Lord gave me opportunity to lead him to salvation. This individual had repented of his deeds and took full responsibility for his actions, but he shared something with me that sobered me on the subject of generation curses and sins. He told me his father molested him for nearly 3 years, and his father was also molested. This does not excuse an individual, but it helps us understand the demons behind the molestation that haunted this family, and that wrecked havoc in their lives. The fact that the jailed father accepted Christ and repented put a stop to this demonic onslaught. (Read Psalms 32, 38, and 51) Unconfessed sin makes us not only an emotional wreck, but can affect us physically as well.

Ps 38:1 O LORD, do not rebuke me in your anger
or discipline me in your wrath.
Ps 38:2 For your arrows have pierced me,
and your hand has come down upon me.
Ps 38:3 Because of your wrath there is no health in my body;
my bones have no soundness because of my sin.
Ps 38:4 My guilt has overwhelmed me
like a burden too heavy to bear.

Ps 38:5 My wounds fester and are loathsome
because of my sinful folly.
Ps 38:6 I am bowed down and brought very low;
all day long I go about mourning.
Ps 38:7 My back is filled with searing pain;
there is no health in my body.
Ps 38:8 I am feeble and utterly crushed;
I groan in anguish of heart.

Ps 38:9 All my longings lie open before you, O Lord;
my sighing is not hidden from you.
Ps 38:10 My heart pounds, my strength fails me;
even the light has gone from my eyes.
Ps 38:11 My friends and companions avoid me because of my wounds. NIV

Introduction to Site

INTRODUCTION

I am creating this site with the hope of helping Christian men and women that may be struggling with sexual sin and the temptations connected with sexual sin. We live in an age when illicit sexual intercourse is the norm, Pornography is in mainstream society, and sexual perversions are considered the everyday way that modern men and women live. The Bible is filled with examples of the same sins and struggles we have today. Samson is on the cover because he was the “poster child” for a believer with sexual addictions. Samson however had a comeback because he cried out to God. If you are struggling, maybe it’s time for you to cry out for help. The problem is the pulpit is silent on the subject of sexuality positive or negative. Young people today need direction and answers on issues concerning sex. The average teenager today starts having sex at the age of 14; this is terrifying to me.

I hope this short book will help you realize how the enemy carefully calculates your destruction through the avenue of sexual sin. I share some funny stories and personal things so you will know you are not alone in this struggle. Jude 24 is my favorite scripture when it comes to God keeping us in this evil world, meditate on it and make it your mantra. The Lord can keep you from falling, sometime even when you DON’T want to be kept! If don’t believe me keep reading!

Chaplain Mark H. Stevens

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